Archive for the Bizarro Fiction Category

OUT NOW: “Ugly Heaven”

Posted in Bizarro Books, Bizarro Fiction, Carlton Mellick III, surrealism on May 24, 2012 by carltonmellick

My novella Ugly Heaven is finally back in print and is now available at amazon.com.

UGLY HEAVEN

Heaven is no longer a paradise. It was once a blissful utopia full of wonders far beyond human comprehension. But that was a long, long time ago. The afterlife is now in ruins. It has become an ugly, lonely wasteland populated by strange monstrous beasts, masturbating angels, and sad man-like beings wallowing in the remains of the once-great Kingdom of God.

As two men die and awake in Heaven, they find themselves inside of new bodies with strange alien skin. They no longer remember their previous lives. All they really know is that the afterlife is a horrible, ugly place. Desperately seeking answers, allies, and refuge, these two newcomers explore this surreal world. But what they will soon find is that Heaven has become a place not that much different from Hell.

Available at amazon.com

New issue of The Dream People

Posted in Bizarro Authors, Bizarro Books, Bizarro Fiction, Carlton Mellick III, eraserhead press on May 14, 2012 by carltonmellick

dream people 37The Dream People is the ORIGINAL bizarro fiction webzine, debuting back in 1999 (when I was the head editor). It’s now on issue #37. An excerpt from my book Armadillo Fists has been published there. There are also novel excerpts and short stories from Michael A. Arnzen, Blake Butler, Sean Kilpatrick, William Pauley III, Andersen Prunty, Donna Fleck and Gary J. Shipley. And an essay from Lance Olsen.

Check it out here: http://www.dreampeople.org/

Cover art for future books: Wonka, Quicksand House, and Satan Burger: 10th Anniversary Edition

Posted in art, Bizarro Artists, Bizarro Books, Bizarro Fiction on May 8, 2012 by carltonmellick



Just showing off cover art for books that won’t be coming out for quite a while. There’s “Wonka” which is kind of like a retelling of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory in the world of Beyond Thunderdome, “Quicksand House” a quiet surreal story about children in search of their parents inside a mansion the size of a country, and the super-sized 10 year anniversary edition of Satan Burger which will feature a lot of bonus material like illustrations, new intros, and perhaps even new bonus chapters. (Note: this version won’t be replacing the original edition with the butt on the cover.)

OUT NOW: “Red World”

Posted in Bizarro Books, Bizarro Events, Bizarro Fiction, Carlton Mellick III on April 30, 2012 by carltonmellick

My novelette “Red World” has just been released by White belly Press. It is a 30 page trade paperback with a very limited run of 100 copies. If you want a copy I suggest you get it right away.

This story tells the tale of a recovering junky trying to save his 8-year-old brother from a life of prostitution in a surreal version of New York City — a place where street kids mutate into fish-like creatures, the homeless stilt-walk through oceans of insects, and the only colors left visible to the human eye are shades of red.

For those of you who like darker urban bizarro tales similar to my novellas Egg Man or Crab Town, this is a story I recommend.

To reserve a copy contact Matthew Humphrey at:
whitebellypress@gmail.com

OUT NOW: “The Handsome Squirm”

Posted in Bizarro Books, Bizarro Fiction, Carlton Mellick III, surrealism, Uncategorized on April 18, 2012 by carltonmellick

THE HANDSOME SQUIRM

A tale of marriage, child-rearing, and vaginas that eat people.

A man is arrested in the middle of the night. He doesn’t know why. He doesn’t remember committing any crime. The cops drop him off in a small community in the middle of the woods where a wedding is about to begin. It is his wedding. He doesn’t recognize the bride, but she’s allegedly pregnant with his children. All twelve of them. And by law, he must marry her or go to prison for the next two decades.

But who is this strange woman he is to spend the rest of his life with? She doesn’t seem quite human. Her expressions are cold and emotionless. Her movements are like that of a spider. She is Usagi, a creature who feeds on her human mate during pregnancy. Now this man has to find a way to terminate the marriage if he is to survive. But it’s not going to be easy. His friends, his family, and his country are all against him. They believe a father should be willing to give up anything for the sake of his family. Even his life.

Like Franz Kafka’s The Trial meets an erotic body horror version of The Blob, this darkly absurd tale is classic Mellick.

AVAILABLE AT AMAZON.COM

T-2000 action figure

Posted in Bizarro Fiction, Mr. T, zombies on January 2, 2012 by carltonmellick

For those of you who have read my book Zombies and Shit, you know that Mr. T is featured in the story as a zombie-smashing cyborg called the T-2000. Here’s a T-2000 action figure made by Warhorse Customs.

Check out more images here:

T-2000 at figurerealm.com

PS – This is just a fan made custom. It’s not actually for sale.

COMING SOON: “Tumor Fruit”

Posted in Bizarro Books, Bizarro Fiction, Carlton Mellick III on December 14, 2011 by carltonmellick

Armadillo Fists will be out in a week or two, Handsome Squirm will be out in a month, and after that will be this book which has the working title TUMOR FRUIT. This one is an island survival story, kind of like a bizarro version of Castaway. I’ve always been a fan of wilderness survival stories so this is one I’m really excited about.

Bizarro Christmas Books

Posted in Bizarro Books, Bizarro Fiction, Carlton Mellick III, Christmas boks on December 9, 2011 by carltonmellick

Ready to shove some holiday cheer up somebody’s ass?
Do so with one of these four bizarro Christmas classics.

santa steps outsanta conquers homophobeschristmas on cracksausagey santa

BizarroCon Reports

Posted in Bizarro Books, Bizarro Events, Bizarro Fiction, Carlton Mellick III, Uncategorized on November 30, 2011 by carltonmellick

BizarroCon was about a week or so ago and I’m still riding the high caused by this awesome event. For those of you who don’t know, BizarroCon is an annual four day meetup of about 80 writers and artists involved in the Bizarro Fiction genre. We get together at Edgefield Manor outside of Portland, OR, which is also a brewery, winery, distillery. It’s four days full of parties, workshops, crazy performances, readings, networking, brainstorming, and planning the future of the bizarro fiction genre. If you’re a writer of bizarro fiction, it’s something you should be going to every single year.

I didn’t write a con report for this year’s bizarrocon, but I recommend checking out these con reports from other attendees:

Sam Reeve’s Top 10 Highlights of Bizarrocon 2011

David W Barbee’s Fast Times at BizarroCon ’11

Brian Keene’s BizarroCon report

Spike Marlowe’s report

A complete list of my books published in 2011

Posted in Bizarro Books, Bizarro Fiction, Carlton Mellick III, Uncategorized on November 29, 2011 by carltonmellick

For those of you who haven’t been following my releases, here’s a list of all of my books published in 2011:

Aramdillo Fists is due out soon, but probably not until after Christmas. Then Handsome Squirm will likely come out soon after that. However, these two are not yet available.

It’s been a productive year. 7 are new titles, 5 are reprints. Next year will likely be just as productive.