Carlton Mellick III

https://carltonmellick.com/2009/10/09/more-illustrations-from-warrior-wolf-women-of-the-wasteland/

Christopher Moore and Me

Posted in Bizarro Authors, Bizarro Events on December 2, 2009 by carltonmellick

Earlier this year I got the chance to meet Christopher Moore for the first time. It was at the Locus Awards in Seattle. He was the host of the awards. I’ve been a big fan of his work for a long time, so I was in fan boy mode while I was there. So, like a fan boy, during the signing session before the awards I went up to him to sign a copy of Fool. But what threw me off was that he recognized me.

He said something like, “Carlton Mellick III? I’ve been excited to meet you all weekend!” A dumbfounded look crossed my face and he said. “Man, you have the craziest book titles! … And the kinkiest fans!”

We talked for a while and I soon realized he is one of the coolest, nicest, most down to earth writers I’ve ever met. And I’ve met a ton of them.

Recently an author friend told me that I should quote what Christopher Moore said to me and use it as a blurb. I wasn’t sure if that’s okay to do, since it was done verbally and wasn’t in writing. But people have said “No, you totally should!”

So I think I might have to, because it is a pretty awesome blurb:

“Carlton Mellick III has the craziest book titles… and the kinkiest fans!” – Christopher Moore

I especially like it because it praises my readers more than my work. That’s a pretty rare thing. So there it is. I’m positing it on my website right now. Though I’ll be using the blurb online, I probably won’t use it elsewhere unless I get explicit permission. Maybe I’ll contact him about it soon.

I might have to also blog about my experience with Chuck Palahniuk at some point. He was one my instructors at the Clarion workshop, so I basically lived with him for a week. There’s a lot of stories from that. A great guy. Conversations with him are endlessly interesting, because he has so many weird stories and anecdotes.

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WOLF GIRL ROAD WARRIORS – more illustrations from Warrior Wolf Women

Posted in Bizarro Books on November 25, 2009 by carltonmellick

Some more illustrations from Warrior Wolf Woman of the Wasteland.

Available at amazon.com:

Check out other Warrior Wolf Women images here:

and here:

https://carltonmellick.com/2009/09/30/illustrations-for-warrior-wolf-women-of-the-wasteland/

Write-ups on the Bizarro Movement

Posted in Bizarro Fiction on November 24, 2009 by carltonmellick

Some of these were found online this week, people blogging about Bizarro. Check them out:

From the Ghostwoods blog, there is this:

A STORM IS COMING

Deep in the bowels of the Internet, something is stirring. It’s the red-headed bastard child of Punk, thanks to a wild and filthy night orgying with MTV, William Burroughs, Robert Anton Wilson and Lewis Caroll. As culture has expanded and exploded in the computer age, we’ve become more and more comfortable and familiar with concepts and ideas that used to be niche. Spell-flinging wizards. Vampires. Cthulhu. Giant stompy robots. Aliens cutting ventilation ports in cows. What used to be hardcore geek niche is mainstream now, and the younger you are, the more natural all this stuff is.

At the same time, entertainment has become, well, burstier. MTV blips are the usual example, but in every area, stuff is being served up in smaller and smaller chunks, with brighter lights and louder bells and whistles.

The result is a new wave of absurdity. I’m not going to get all Lit Critic and start talking about Dadism or post-modern playfulness; they’re old boxes, and they’re unhelpful. The movement — and it _is_ a movement, one which is gathering steam — has decided to call itself Bizarro. The only real aim or rule of Bizarro is to be entertaining. It is almost always weird and absurd, frequently straddling lines between fantasy, horror and sci-fi. Their worlds are not predictable, and the narrative structures often lack form.

The Bizarro movement is centred on fiction, but its tendrils are extending out to art, animation, sculpture and music. Despite the lack of previously established norms, Bizarro work is usually easy to follow. It’s a sign of the quality of the pioneers involved that it is still good, because most of the old structures are there because they’re easy tools for creators to use.

Bizarro is not comfortable. Much of it is deliberately provocative, even offensive. It’s certainly unhinged, too. But if the chaotic juxtapositions and genuinely free creativity it can offer are to your tastes, then there’s a very rich vein of material waiting for you.

Bizarro Central is probably your best port of call if you want to know more.

Personally? I think I’m in love…

And on Jeff VanderMeer’s blog, there was a writeup on bizarro (written by Eden Robins), called “Bizarro Fiction: Stout Hearts and Strong Stomachs”

Here’s an excerpt:

At a time when everyone seems to be scrambling to find their place in the publishing world, it seems to me that the bizarro folks have got the right idea — do what you love, use what you have, and have a good time doing it. Because really, isn’t that what we all should be doing?

Eraserhead Press was also mentioned in this article: Independent Publishers Who Are Reinventing The Future

https://carltonmellick.com/2009/10/09/more-illustrations-from-warrior-wolf-women-of-the-wasteland/

FAN ART – Ocean of Lard

Posted in Bizarro Artists on November 23, 2009 by carltonmellick

Having an artist illustrate your work is one of the most satisfying things for a writer. But even better than having a publisher pay an artist to illustrate your books is finding art that a fan created just for fun. I don’t know who illustrated the images below. Somebody else found them and sent them to me. They are illustrations of the characters in the Eye World section of “Ocean of Lard.”

If you created any art based around my fiction, send it to me. I’d love to see it.

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More images from Warrior Wolf Women of the Wasteland

Posted in Bizarro Books on November 21, 2009 by carltonmellick

Some more character sketches from Warrior Wolf Woman of the Wasteland.

Check out other Warrior Wolf Women images here:

and here:

https://carltonmellick.com/2009/09/30/illustrations-for-warrior-wolf-women-of-the-wasteland/

The books is available at amazon.com

2 Comments »

Writing Marathon at Voodoo Doughnuts

Posted in Bizarro Authors, Bizarro Events on November 20, 2009 by carltonmellick

Portland is known for its weird writers. It is also known for its weird doughnuts. For the next three days, these two things will collide…

PORTLAND BIZARRO AUTHOR INVADES VOODOO DOUGHNUT FOR THREE DAYS

PORTLAND, OR (November 18, 2009) This Friday, November 20th, Bizarro author Cameron Pierce will move into Voodoo Doughnut Too (1501 N.E. Davis) for three days to write Die You Doughnut Bastards! The first novella in a trilogy of food stories, Die You Doughnut Bastards! is a bizarro comedy set in a futuristic Portland where sentient Viking doughnuts overthrow human society. It will feature cameos from several doughnuts sold at Voodoo.

One month after celebrating the release of his second book, The Ass Goblins of Auschwitz (Eraserhead Press, 2009), and completing his performance series Meat Magick, Pierce is diving into his most absurd and ambitious project yet.

From Friday, November 20th through Sunday, November 22nd, Pierce will be living and writing in Voodoo Doughnut Too (except when they close between 3am and 6am, then he’ll freeze). He’ll eat nothing but doughnuts during this marathon, so drop in and share a Grape Ape and coffee with him, or just sit back and witness insanity in action.

Download Free Bizarro Books

Posted in Bizarro Books on November 19, 2009 by carltonmellick

UPDATE: These books are no longer available to download, but there is a torrent of the bizarro starter kit floating around if you are interested in getting that. You can download it here: http://thepiratebay.org/torrent/4861416/The_Bizarro_Starter_Kit_(Orange)

In an effort to persuade readers to buy more bizarro books for Christmas, Eraserhead Press is making five sample books available free for download between now and Thanksgiving. They include both bizarro starter kits, Super Fetus by Adam Pepper, Ass Goblins of Auschwitz by Cameron Pierce, and my own bizarro Christmas book, Sausagey Santa. If you like these then ask for more bizarro books for Christmas or buy them as presents for your friends and family. The bizarro children’s books, such as MachoPoni and The Faggiest Vampire, make especially good Christmas presents. Sausagey Santa, of course, is even better.

Here are the books available for download:

bsk1

An introduction to the bizarro genre, featuring 8 short novels and 2 short story collections by ten bizarro writers. Click here for more information.

bsk2

Featuring short novels and story collections by ten more bizarro writers. Click here for more information.

sausagey

A Troma-esque Christmas adventure, featuring Nazi snowmen, Christmas fetishists, elves who are way too obsessed with playing Dungeons and Dragons, and a Santa who is made out of sausage. Click here for more information.

super fetus

Try to abort him, and this fetus will kick your ass! Learn More and Buy Here

Forget everything you know about Auschwitz – You’re about to be Shit Slaughtered! Learn More and Buy Here

If you like one of the books, please take a few minutes to write a quick review for it on Amazon.com or Goodreads. Or post about it on your blog or favorite message board. Hell, just tell your friends about it the next time you are drinking together.

These small actions really do a lot to help out independent artists. And in this era of crushing multi-national conglomerates and economic strife, we independents can use all the help we can get.

And if you don’t like the book, at least you didn’t have to pay for it.

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Download Shatnerquake for free!

Posted in Bizarro Books on November 17, 2009 by carltonmellick

From bizarro author Jeff Burk:

To you, brave pirate of the digital seas,

Thank you for devoting some of your precious internet tubing to the downloading of my first book, Shatnerquake.

You may be wondering why I am offering my book for free. It is because I am an avid downloader as well. I believe that information, art, and entertainment wants to be free.

The internet has allowed us all so many opportunities to share with each other. To resist this is to resist the future. Others may attempt to block this forward progression with lawsuits and file protection. I, instead, want to do what I can to contribute to this wonderful digital community.

So, thanks for downloading and taking an interest in my work. If you like the book, please take a few minutes to write a quick review on Amazon.com or Goodreads. Or post about it on your blog or favorite message board. Hell, just tell your friends about it the next time you are drinking together.

These small actions really do a lot to help out independent artists. And in this era of crushing multi-national conglomerates and economic strife, we independents can use all the help we can get.

And if you don’t like the book, at least you didn’t have to pay for it.

Yours in downloading,

Jeff Burk

You can download his ebook here: megaupload.com

Visit Jeff’s blog here: http://jeffburk.wordpress.com